a mis amigos...

I don't know what prompted this blog entry. I meant to write a poem, to be honest. But I sat and twiddled my thumbs, trying to think of two good lines that would count as the start to a fantabulous poem, and I was lost. When I couldn't come up two meaningfully poetic lines, even after looking at the beautiful snow covered land just outside my window, I gave up. I've probably lost my poetic flair, at least temporarily, if not forever. So I shall stick to prose for the time being (Oh the reason I wanted to write a poem was to challenge myself to use fewer words than I normally do. When writing prose, I just go on and on. Like just now!) I digress. Nothing new there. So, as I was saying, I am not exactly sure what prompted this entry. Probably the fact that I just spent one of the most awesome weekends with friends. It got me thinking of all the other awesome moments with friends and how things change.

I celebrated the past weekend, birthdays of not one, but two of my closest friends. It was a weekend I didn't want to see the end of. The weekend passed by way too quickly, filled with unbelievable amounts of laughter, truckloads of fun, seemingly endless conversation and lots of memorable moments! And as it ended and we dispersed to continue with our routine, mundane lives, I realised that this is what I wanted for the rest of my life. I wanted moments like these, interspaced as they may be, to jolt me out of my everyday mundaneness and induce some spark into the dullness that comes with routine. But more importantly, I want friends like these for the rest of my life. Friends who I know I can count on to be there, to travel for insane hours to spend few good hours together, to incite the neverending laughter, to share joy as well as wipe away the tears, and to accept each other's idiosyncracies and to work around the inevitable conflicts.

I know, as I write, that I haven't been the best friend I could have been. There are moments that I wish I'd picked up the phone and made that call that might have saved a friendship from going sour, or written that letter that would have kept me in touch with the people I grew up with. I regret those moments the most, I regret telling myself I'd do it 'tomorrow', I regret not calling, not writing, not keeping in touch. But as I turn 25 (almost), I realise it's a little late to try and mend some of those relationships. Some of my closest friends (at some point) are now the people I exchange pleasantries with twice a year, on each others' birthdays, and though I regret it, I have come to accept that it is probably time to let it go.

But, I have also come to realise that my best friends are the people, who regardless of the number of years we have not spoken to each other, resume our conversation from where we last left off, the people, who make an effort to keep in touch with me, because they know i suck at it, the people who when we talk even after a year, first blast me for not calling ever, but then proceed to tell me about their whole year, month by month! These are the people I cherish the most, and I have to admit, take advantage of the most as well! These are the people I want to keep in touch with, and these are the kind of friends I want to have. The '4am' kind of friends, the kind of friends for whom time and place doesnt matter, the kind who don't keep count of who called how many times, or who wrote how many times, all that matters is that one call, that one mail, that one card that reminds them that we are bound by a relationship that will last for the rest of our lives. And this blog entry serves as a very small yet very heartfelt tribute to them.

Each time I moved and shifted base (which I have done 6 times now!), and changed schools and cities, I always thought I'd never find another person who I could be friends with, and each time I was proven wrong, and boy, am I glad for that! I may not be in touch with all of my friends, but each of them holds a very special place in the shoebox of my memories. The ones I am in touch with are the ones who never gave up on me, and they are the ones I love with all my heart and soul; Rohini, Aru, Anjana, Ritu, Mikhil, Prajakta, Sadekar, Praveen, Vinay, Vivek, Prasad, Phalgun, to you I say, thank you for never giving up, and for always being there. Then there are some people I respect more than anyone else, second only to my family; Sagar, Dhiru, Bhatia, thank you for giving us a home away from home. I have also read this quote about how you can't choose family and hence you have friends, and I am so thankful I didn't get to choose my family, because I couldn't have chosen better family than the family I have. I consider myself extremely lucky that my cousins are amongst my closest friends. They know my whole life history, all my flaws, all my highs and all my lows, and the fact that we are bound by blood just makes these bonds even harder to break. Neha, Kritika, Roshan and Anuj, to you all I have to say is I love you from the very bottom of my heart! :)

As I think about all the happy times spent with all my friends, I realise how blessed I have been to always have someone I could lean on through each step of my life. And as these days grow into years and the distance grows into miles, all I hope is I can be as good a friend as I have been fortunate to have. I truly love you all!